Funny What's Hot/What's Not

BigDC got something for you

What's Hot:

• North winning! Means I don't have to take such high doses of valium this week!
• The price of crack, which clearly must be going cheap if "sincere's"' late night post is anything to go by. The evidence is here.
• Burdon scoring 20.
• The Central District women's basketball team, the best pre-pubescent ABL team going around.
• Erik B getting 20.
• A freakish game from Jason Dix. He hasn't carved up Sturt like that since the Under 20 Winter Season Grand Final in 1993. 36, 19 and 6. Enough said. Great MVP race heating up between Oscar and Dix.
• Big Burdon getting 20.
• Sturt coach Alan Lee filling in his Woolacott vote-getting form: 1. Neal Bridgemann 2.Neal Bridgemann 3. Neal Bridgemann
• Doesn't get mentioned much, but Erik B went for 20.
• SA Metro v SA Country U16 Men showdown: Sunday, 10am at Wayville. Featuring Paul "Stalin" Arnott.
• Those country bumpkins SA Country U16 girls defeating SA Metro U16 girls on Saturday, apparently.
• Paul "Candy man" Prior, the only man with a lead single by 50 cent about him.
• Jason "Panther" Baylis lasting over 2 minutes before picking up his first foul against Eastern.
• Daniel Phillips 26 points, still scoring at a good clip.
• David Bowley with 17 points and 18 rebounds leading Tigers to the win.
• Hambour 24 and 12 with some nice videos to boot.
• Jye Watson 36, 7 and 5 assists.
• Brad Davis 23 points on 10/21 shooting v Woodville.
• An addition; Cayla Francis going for 28 and 15 v Tracey Braitwaite, which equates to about the combined scoring of two Norwood women ABL matches.

• The Woodville court announcer calling Luke Mapunda "Mr. Cool". If he's Mr. Cool you can call me Frank Sinatra bitches.
• The Woodville music selection with one crap r 'n' b track after another. It felt more like a night out with Mark Davis at Club 33 than an ABL game.
• Brad Davis not blocking out shooter on free throws. Drop him to reserves!
• Sturt coach Alan Lee berating umpire Neal Bridgemann for AT LEAST half an hour after the game.
• Dawsons Creek
• Jason Baylis reciveing game MVP honours in the HoopsSA boxscore. Proof that the system is defective.
• The Black Eye Peas.
• Brad Bungey trying his hardest to gain the title of looselips from Hawkes with a tech against Woodville on the weekend.
• Andrew Puddifoot shooting 2/12 for 6 points vs Eastern.
• Jessie McCartney just for being a pretty-boy punk.

• Goes to Darren Ng. Sturt's only Asian player and maybe the Central ABL only Asian player wins the award with 33 points as Sturt go down to Forestville.

• Ben Madgen for Eastern. 16 points in the first half on his way to 28 on 9/13 shooting with 7 rebounds in 29 minutes. His biggest game yet? Certainly a gem of a performance to help end Eastern's losing streak and to rise to fame with BigDC's find of the week.

• I know this is too obvious due to his high standards he sets for himself but hands down its Oscar Forman for flop of the week. Going for 0 points and 1 rebound in the second half Oscar racked up 11 and 7 on 5/16 shooting in 42 minutes. At least if Baylis played 42 minutes he would commit about 18 fouls and be called for about five. Might even miss a lay-up or two. Shit in 42 minutes Mike Mckay would at least break both his hips and lose control of his bladder at least once which makes for some entertaining viewing. Oscar = flop.

• Yes the list is going commercial. For the price of a tank of petrol and a bottle of Johnny Walker I will praise random hacks every week in this space. This week's hack is Dean Nyberg from Forestville. If you weren't blinded by his amazing playing ability you'll be amazed by his coaching ability. Some highlights include his courtside demeanor, which consists of wearing army boots and marching up and down the sidelines screaming "play faster" thru a megaphone which is a style I will hope to incorporate into my coaching style in the future. His trainings are also thinly veiled sweat shop sessions, where Dean plays a drum at the front of a basketball hall demanding his players make four hundred Gucci wallets to be on the streets of Hong Kong by the weekend, which is a coaching plan Paul Arnott personally approved. As a great player and coach it's no wonder Dean is known as The Complete Package on the streets. If any players, coaches or parents wish to bribe me, just look for the token Asian sitting in the corner of Hillcrest stadium and approach the charming white man sitting next to him with a brown bag of crisp $100 bills.

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